“Each of us has the right and the responsibility to assess the roads which lie ahead and those over which we have traveled, and if the road ahead looms ominous or unpromising, and the road back uninviting, then we need to gather our resolve and carrying only the necessary baggage, step off that road into another direction. If the new choice is also unpalatable, without embarrassment, we must be ready to change that one as well.” (Maya Angelou)
Every aspect of my life has been in major transition over the last few years. After much introspection and transformational personal work, I left a marriage of 20 years. The relationship was in the end emotionally and financially abusive. When my ex-husband would not leave, I slept on the floor of my own home for 4 months. This story, however, is not about divorce. That is simply the backdrop of events that preceded the triumph of creating a new life filled with love and integrity.
There have been times in my life where others have told me I am courageous. I don’t know whether or not I am, I know only that it would be accurate to say I crushed the foundation of my life because it was no longer the right foundation for the life I wanted.
Since this transition began, I have gotten a dog; sold my former marital home; met a wonderful new partner; co-created a blended family with my new partner; bought a new home with my partner; left my liberal religious congregation (where I was also employed as a Program Director); participated in the care for my aging father; lived in our new home while under renovation (for nine months); started a new business and reformulated virtually all the friendships in my life.
This is a story about the journey to persona grata. It is about the cycles of life, about being human, about having fear and sadness and self-doubt and moving ahead anyways. It is about recognizing the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow when it doesn’t look like you dreamed it would look when you were a little girl. It’s about finding the real pot of gold. I do hope you will join me on this journey.